heading for the door

wake up 

i look to the blinds next to me

the same windowsill i’ve probably painted view over many times feel different in this limelight

the slits of colored light from rising sun paints my room in warm inviting color

red, pink, yellow… what else am i forgetting… orange 

but orange seems to be in everything these days 

from the contrast of before where everything was black and blue from the pacific winter

maybe spring changed everything for the better orange undertones arent so bad

this light waking me up like a kiss on the head from a lover i’ve known

“wake up on your own time” it whispers to me

so i do, i get up after awhile to put on some tea

the boiling water turns a yellow-green from honey chamomile bags that dance and mingle

the warm sweetness of it all in a bright morning alone in the kitchen

the herbal scents and the soft smile from the sun

the warm embrace of the sun guiding me throughout my morning, holding my hand in its warm sunlit love

i’m vulnerable now and my house knows it

maybe i sound crazy…

i go to the bathroom to wash up before making my breakfast, the warm water, blue and orange

the sunlight brings me back to the kitchen shining upon the fresh loaf of dark bread

melt my butter and toast my bread, this feels like heaven in my head

turning on the stove and seeing the flames light up and warm my face like the sun did not so long 

i let the butter melt in the pan with warm filling aromas… yellow and white

i place the soft bread in the pan to toast, taking small sips of my golden green tea

the bread turns brown and crispy after about a minute

i transfer it to the plate, butter, bread, plate, repeat until i’m satisfied with the amount

i use this same pan for an egg, the crack of the shell and the soft sizzling of the surrounding butter creates a safe and familiar aroma

sunny side up like my new friend

after i cook my breakfast i go to sit next to the window

“eat slowly please” some light says gently 

and i do just that, i spread my preserves upon my warm and crispy toast and enjoy my time alone

the crack of the yellow yolk, bright happiness leaks out on my plate

purple, yellow, brown, orange

was breakfast always this kind?

the warm tastes seeping into my tongue

soon i’ll have breakfast like this every morning

me, the warming sun, and the coastline if life is so kind

i did it, and i will keep doing it for myself whenever i get the chance, whenever i know i can catch another break

sit down, relax, breakfast, repeat

meanwhile i am finally capable 

i head for the door

i think i’ve stared at the paint on this door about a thousand times over

the way it’s spread lightly yet solid enough to hold its color against harsh rains 

the wood is hard and sturdy and i begin to contemplate how hard it is to paint

the tedious work, how much i would hate it, how good of a job it really was, the type of brush it would take, the sound of wet paint on a hard dry surface, lathering the tan wood in white coding which would soon dry and become the exterior 

i know i will catch another break

the sun hits it just right and is the one thing that truly surrounds me

yellow, white… what else

orange

all of this over a windowsill because the sun shined just right

i decide to stay and contemplate my day

breakfast truly is the most important meal

i put on some music and get lost in thought