if i could take a break

what would be it like to start over? like a new identity, new name, new place to move to, a new persona of sorts.

as in madonnas song ‘holiday’ — “we need a holiday… just one day out of life”

everything is so messy right now, very much so. i just.. i feel like it would be better if i start over one day. what if i were to snap and i leave? i wish i could with no social consequences, i wouldn’t want to leave anyone worrying. i don't want anyone worrying.

if, one day, i were to do something like this, just assume i died in a comedic way. because i most likely did. maybe. that would make a fun topic for one of those murder mystery podcasts!

i’m crying right now, i act like i didn't do anything wrong. i’ve made mistakes that i wanted to fix. but i’m just a plague, nothing but a monster. 

coincidentally, the song of the day: holiday by madonna! because we could all use a break.