The Last of Erikson (and Bob) | Bob (duh.)

v. Identity vs. Role Confusion

Oh boy, teenager time. Since Lakynn has finally entered this stage, she has begun to question her own identity and role in her life and others. I realized it had started when she began asking me questions about finding myself and realizing my own sexuality. Of course, I answered all of her questions and assured her that she did not need to “figure herself out” immediately. I told her it was a process and that as long as she finds herself with people that make her feel happy or doing tasks that make her happy, she’s doing great. She told me thanks and went to her room, so I wasn’t sure if I did the best job. That was until I heard the news of her joining all of these new school clubs. Some of which being about hobbies I never knew she was into. It’s all about exploration so I’m very proud of her actions in an attempt to develop her own identity.

Two months later, she has come out to me as bisexual. I believe this is a part of her identity so I decided to update this. (If you are wondering, yes, I told her thank you for feeling comfortable enough to tell me and support her nonetheless ((as a father should))).

vi. Intimacy vs. Isolation

Now in her 30s, Lakynn has legally changed her name to Layla. She told me it was because she just wasn’t a fan of the “originality” of her birth name. I don’t blame her given how… Unique, I can say, her mother’s list of names was. She still identifies as a woman and dresses in an androgynous style. (Not that it's a problem.) Nonetheless, she has definitely had her fair share of the modern dating game. It’s crazy how these stages can still impact the rest of her life.  At the moment, she is dealing with a harsh breakup. Luckily, her friends are there for her and this stage does not require romantic intimacy. Having her friends there is all she needs to not feel socially isolated.

vii. Generativity vs. Stagnation

Lawyer Layla is still working hard every day. Her mother and I couldn’t be more proud. She has moved away from her hometown, but still remains in contact with me. (Her mother? I have no idea.) Every night she tells me that she is so happy to be able to make such a vast difference in the world by defending good people and keeping them out of trouble. My mind may be slowly slipping away every moment, but that kickstarted my memory for this page. During her middle adulthood, Layla needs to feel like she is contributing something to the world. Otherwise, she will feel that she lacks a purpose in life. I’m glad to know my daughter knows she has a purpose in this crazy world.

viii. Integrity vs. Despair

Layla is getting older and so am I. She has finally retired, like me, and decided to make a visit. We sat down together in my kitchen and she made tea for the both of us. We spoke for a long time, but a highlight was when she reflected on her life. From the beginning to now. She told me she felt she did all that she could growing up and that her life was well spent. It reminded me of this, so I decided to show her all of the documentation Careienne and I had done. Tears. Happy tears were split. I told her that this is definite proof of all of the satisfying work she has done and to keep it up.