whimpering

(this is an overshare about mwording so.)

i do it too often. i can’t imagine myself being intimate with others but i do it all the time. i hold my breath. i whimper. i whine. i try not to make it obvious to the other side of the wall my brain is exploding as i get really sensitive and i tickle the most hidden part of me. i want to stop it but losing control? not focusing on anything but the sensation? it’s going to become a coping mechanism and i don’t want it to but it makes me feel good in a world where i only feel bad. :(