Depression&Obsession

   I don't know what to do anymore. All my days are blurring together and the only time people acknowledge me it is to comment on how disgusting my habits and addictions are. They've already drilled it into my head that im a worthless failure, I don't know why they have to keep shouting it.

   I sleep all the time to distract myself from how excruciatingly slow the days have been scraping along. After a while I find that I've slept so much that months will go completely over my head. It truly is refreshing to be completely unaware of whats going on most times, too bad it's viewed as rude to be unaware of everything going on around you.

   I become obsessed with small things that have no value to anybody else. And even if someone found my things worthwhile, they would be another fuck up like me. (no offense to my besties <3). It seems like sometimes I could just slip into the feeling of ache growing inside me and lose my mind. Go crazy and kill everyone. I wouldn't do that of course because I haven't reached that level of pure insanity. I think maybe its the feeling of jealousy that makes me go mad. Sometimes I obsess over people and forget they have their own lives not consisting of being with me all of the time. I can be so upset because somebody else hung out with him more than I ever could. it makes me want to make someone hurt, and idk why