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i recently got a new part-time job and i kinda actually look forward to going the days i work! it's kinda weird but true. i think it's mostly the people (my coworkers) tbh. i work with such a diverse range of people it's insane. and i love it!!
i actually was invited to hang out with a few of my coworkers last weekend and it was pretty fun! we went candle shopping and ate at cheesecake factory. they're so nice!
i'm glad that i'm getting to meet all these cool people, but i've been struggling with derealization for a while now and it's really making it hard for me to feel like im truly connecting. it's like i'm going through the motions of everything and trying my best, but the profound loneliness of a detachment from reality makes things extremely difficult.
i don't remember what normal felt like. what it felt like to easily partake in life, without the sensation that it's all just a dream. this shit is so scary sometimes.
apparently the only way to get rid of it is to just continue living my life like "normal", by continuing to work hard at school and going to work and chatting with friends and making plans, and not ruminating on the issue. which means this is the last blog post/diary entry i will be making on this matter (until it's over lol!).
anyways, that was a little piece of my life :)
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⛧Max iz Dead⛧
ive been struggling with derealization for a couple years now, for the longest time i didnt know what it was and i assumed i was just different from everyone else. ive never talked to someone else w/ derealization, but its really comforting to know that im not alone :)
mitzi
hey thats so exciting to hear!! ughhhh i swear ive applied to kfc about 500 times already and heard nothinggggggggg bahahaha but thats so brilliant!! when i was going through thoughts like that, u know it was actually earlier this year, i just thought whatever the answer to these socratic questions that are making my mind explode are, i dont give a damn coz idk i think therefore i am. make the most of what you have. but bahahaha anyways i hope that ur new job will do u well!!!! keep happy and take care, have a brilliant day and i hope that work will be the best thing ever!!!! good on u!!!
thank u so much for the kind words!! i appreciate it a lot. and yea... maybe i really should take a page out of descartes's book xD
im prayin ya eventually get that job at kfc haha :,D GOODL UCK
by i s a b e l l a; ; Report
ofcofc anytime!! and thanks lots i hope i get it too!!!! take care!!
by mitzi; ; Report