TW:Cutting, Sewerslide
So my moms super emotionally abusive and stuff and I only talk to my uncle about my issues because my mom likes to use them against me. I have recently started to cut again, and I told him. He's noticed how worried I am for when he moves out, like I don't know what I would do with myself and that I would probably try and kill myself again. I've been cutting since I was 11 but when he moved in he found out that I would, I don't remember how or when I told him but he was made aware of it. I then told him about the way that I've been feeling and before I relapsed, I had told him during the school day which was like 8 to 9 hours before it happened. I had gone to a football game for the JROTC and when I was there I had asked this kid for his number and he said that he didn't know, and no it wasn't Nick. Nick had dropped the JROTC, but that's on personal preference. I get that things happen but that made my night so much worse. But when my mom picked me up from the football game I was super depressed about everything, us losing the football game, my dad not texting me back and not talking to me and a bunch of other things. I wasn't going to cut until I came into my room to see my scissors there and then I lost it. Afterwards I texted my uncle and let him know what had happened after and surprisingly he wasn't mad and then me and him talked about some issues that I've been having and then I started doing it more. And the next morning I did it again, even after he had begged me to stop, I couldn't every place I would go I would see things that were sharp and it triggered me so i did act on it. Every other weekend that he has his kids, I come with him. That was one of these weekends and because I had to babysit, he ended up having to come get me around 10pm. So after he got me and my mom was home, me and him talked about it and the main thing that stuck out to me was that he told me was, "I know you don't want to die Kayden, you've proven that to me". And then the whole time that me and him were talking about things that might help me in the future and about that if I need to scream it out to scream it out or if I needed to cry it out to cry it out to do so. And over texts he told me that even though I wasn't his kid he was going to treat me like I was because nobody else obviously would. So when he moves out, no matter what, I'm coming with him. We will figure out how to make him my legal guardian and shit but yeah, I'm moving out when he does.
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elli0tr0ckz
i can relate a bit sadly
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