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This morning I woke up to like nine notifications on my IG and they were all from my ex?? He sent one message and then several voice messages, I'm not sure why he seems to be trying to crawl back into my life. He texted that he "never forgot what I did to u. It just incravred into my brain like a jigsaw".
Some of his voice messages go on about feeling the same things I felt, that can mean two things: he's lost someone he loved, or he was cheated on. And yes, both of those things happened right before I dumped him (and I really wish I had dumped him sooner). Either way, there's no point coming back to me and trying to vent, though he has my sympathy I suppose, for whatever has happened, simply because I know the feeling of grief and heartbreak.
He also stated that he still thinks of me, well to that I would say "Why on earth would you want to do that?" (I'm not texting him back). Also I must stress, I hate voice messages, I hate them very much for literally no reason. He seems "proud" that I've moved on and he seems to understand that there's no way I'd come back to him lmao. He says he's "matured" since whatever's happened, and possibly since me. He used to be rather easily influenced by his friends who were toxic towards both him and me.
He also mentioned that what we had back then was "good". I agree with that to some extent, we did have fun playing games together, and I miss THAT. I miss the memories, the same goes to my ex friend, Deanna. I miss the fun times I had, but I do not miss the person. I want to make that clear, that I miss the event and NOT the people! I can't quite tell if he misses me or not though, perhaps because he seems to be stammering a bit.
He seems to regret not listening to me back then, he was always influenced by his friends (might be why he swears so much now lmao). Huh, towards the end of some of the messgaes, sounds like he's about to break down in tears. Oof but also lol. He also said in one of his voice messages that he used to catfish people. Well, that's not very nice. Not much else I can say about that other than, shame on him. He then goes on and emphasises that he's "realistic now. I'm so realistic" and then its rather "unrealistic" to try and talk to me. Glad he understands that, but I can't quite make out his intentions.
He also seems to remember my sleeping/ nightly routine/ habits, as in what time I go to sleep etc, which is an odd detail to remember about me... Although it makes sense because we did live through each others phones... haha
Anyway, apologies for the vent/ long story about what my ex messaged me at 11 last night. I just don't understand why. But I suppose I don't understand myself because I'm still reading, and now listening to, his messages. How bizarre.
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