I took a shot in the dark with you. You look nothing like him. We started chatting on OkCupid. I wonder if he's on this site too. You told me you had around twenty exes, more than what he has had. I got scared but still went for it. You asked for my snapchat he had a snapchat too, fucking whore. I didn't give it to you until we talked for around a week or two. You were smooth with it. So was he. But you took your time setting up a date. 

   I got sick. 

He promised me to take care of me while I was sick, he promised to hold my hand, bathe me and brush my hair if I couldn't. I was so sick. He was not there. I had knots in my hair that took so much of my strength away that I had to go to the hospital. It hurt me, he betrayed me and left me to die. You talked to me. You reached out every single day I was sick. You asked if you could do anything to help. My stomach hurt so bad. I lost weight, I wonder if he would like me now that I'm skinny. I couldn't sleep and my stomach hurt so bad. I wanted a heat pad. When I bought that emergency contraception he laid next to me while my uterus cramped up. I already had a heating pad, I remembered the stuffed animals you could warm up in the microwave, it smelt like lavender and was cute. He never bought me stuffed animals. 

You got me that cow. You put in the wrong address and said you would give it to me on our first date at the mall when I was feeling better. 

 I remember feeling impatient but thankful. We had our first date at a Barns And Nobles near that same mall. You came with a bag, there were two gifts inside. The stuffed cow and a decorative rose bear. He was a hopeless romantic too. You sheepishly told me later on 

"I don't know you too well so I just searched up 'gifts for girlfriend' on Amazon." He asked me to be his girlfriend on our second date at the park. 

We laughed so hard together and even though I didn't show it, I knew I would end up dating you. You were low on money, I paid for Spanish food oh no, he's going to use me for money like you did. Gold-digger. 

"I'll get you next time, I swear." He said the same thing. 

I still hurt inside so I asked you if I could sit, you sat next to me looking around but paying attention to me. 

"Can you stand up?" 

Yes I can. He never asked me this, even when my legs hurt, when he made me climb mountains with him, even when I limped after he used my body for his own desires. Thank you. 

We went out to the parking lot looking out into the sky. You had to leave soon. You took a few hits of your pen and looked out into the distance. I recognize your look. You can see something I can't. It's the all knowing stare. 

"I really enjoyed our time together, I really like spending time with you, could we do this again?" He once smiled at me like that, excited after our first date already talking about the second one. I was surprised but glad. 

When I am with you, I feel at home. I never felt that with him.