'healing'

ok so i'm in my english class right now and i was just thinking of how grateful i am of my life and the woman im becoming .

i have a roof over my head, friends who care for me, i can go at the gym, i am followed by a nutritionist, it's almost summer and i am almost done with school, i got rid of negative and energy sucking people and i am working on myself.

i am so proud of myself for trying to change and trying to find myself and sometimes that is hard, the healing mostly, but i am glad i'm doing it.

like everyone, me included at first, thinks that healing process is always being 'happy' and 'content' but that's not true at all.

i don't believe anyone can be happy at all times. it's not "healthy".

healing is a tough process and i think that you don't have to force yourself to heal if you're not ready to step out of your confort zone and change.

healing yourself means leaving the people who o longer serve you, the people that you outgrew, the people that even tho you love, don't love you back.

it means approaching life with a different mindset and being able to call yourself out when you're in the wrong.

it also means unlearning what you thought was normal and learning what YOU think is right and change (or not, it depends) your beliefs.

overall for me, it has been a rollercoaster of emotions but it's changing me for the better and it has given me the chance to live life to the fullest, embracing the good and the not so good, the easy and the harder parts of life.

i still struggle daily but i'm learning not to suppress my "negative" feelings but to embrace them.

so when you see those influencers telling you that the healing process is always fun and happy, trust me it's not, but thats okay because it's part of the process we call life.

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