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wow i haven't written anything in a while like this, but fuuuuuuuck i am not feeling awesome. i'm 100% probably overreacting right now but god i'm in a lot of pain
silent but louder than anything
an inaccurate reflection
looking back at once was
trying not to compare it to new love
those broken shards
can look the same
despite that they're
in a different frame
no one to blame
but my own self
don't think i'll recover
from what i hid on the shelf
it's not the same
and it won't ever be
despite what my head
wants me to believe
but one small thing
sparks nothing but shame
and sends me back
to those awful days
the ones where i cried
my nerves always shot
every word was a lie
and i never forgot
he isn't her
she isn't him
this won't repeat
no, never again
and yet still, why
am i brought to tears
shaking, afraid
to repeat all those years?
it's not gonna happen
i'm fine, its okay
so why won't these feelings
just go away?
it's alright, it's fine
i'll fix it with time
that's just what i'll say
until i feel like i'm okay
silent but louder than anything
an inaccurate reflection
it doesn't show what's really there
so why is it that i'm still scared?
the mirror is muddled, dirty, and broke
and yet on old memories
i still seem to choke
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