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I was reading something the other day
about how when you were born
into a burning house
you think the whole world is on fire.
but it's not.
Well when I was born
I was placed gently
to the arms of an open flame.
I felt as the heat redden to my skin
and rose my cheeks.
but I still played in bonfires and
when I went to the beach vacations in volcanoes.
handcrafted my casket as past time.
I was gifted to the burning house.
the burning house that no one could see it was on fire
but me.
Placed into the hands of the housefire
that I was told that it would never burn me.
I was talking to my therapist about the fire.
About how I was scared to get burned every time
a spark began to escalate.
Every time when I could see a hint of what
I was told that would never burn me
but I would shut down and
surrender to the flames.
Giving in to the boiling temperatures.
Tearing out my clothes hoping that this time,
this time,
it will be different.
this time I will be unscathed.
This time this flame will not burn me.
Not every flame is a housefire
not every boy who bared his breath is a death threat.
Belts can become undone without marking me.
Hands can graze me without edging their pricks in my skin.
So why does it feel like a thousand degrees [...].
I'm doing something wrong now I know it.
It burns I can feel it.
It's on fire.
I'm on fire.
The house is on fire. can't you feel it??
Does it not singe you?
How does this not hurt you?
Can't you feel it?
If this isn't real why am I in pain?
If this isn't real then
why do I flinch when you touch my skin?
If this is all my figment of my imagination,
why have I never worn sunscreen.
They say if you were born into a burning house
you think the whole world is on fire..
But what if that's because it is?
-@givemeattentionrn
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