last night i dreamed about my mother

in a dream last night i saw my mother and her husband. they were in my apartment, taunting me. i screamed back at her, you just want to control everything i do, and i bet it fucking kills you that you don't get to anymore. and in the dream of course i meant that she was in my apartment and i pay my own bills, but reflecting now i think maybe she was trying to reach out to me. i have been begging her to speak to me these past few weeks, and i screamed at her, threw everything back in her face, when i know most of that wasn't her, it was the Mother. i was sobbing in the dream. i woke up crying. i am my worst self around her. i always have been. what does that say about her? what does that say about me?


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