I hate my meds

Though let me be clear on this, I take meds against psychosis and I am very glad that I no longer have delusions. But I hate the side effects so much.

Today I spent 13 hours in bed again, most of it sleeping. And I still feel exhausted and unmotivated to do anything. I do have a job for which I gotta get up early, and I manage to do that. But I feel like a zombie the first 5 hours or so at work. Luckily I don't need to interact with people.

But yeah weekends suck. I can either get up after 8 hours of sleep and feel like total crap or I can sleep 12 hours instead. But then I feel sad at all the wasted time on days I don't have to work. So saturdays I tend to stay up long, cause I don't want to fall asleep and lose all that time. Which causes me to wake up extra late on sundays, today at 3:30pm. But I have to go to bed early enough cause of work the next day, for which I'll still be tired either way cause of the meds. So sundays are just so depressive, very little daylight, much wasted time and doesn't feel like I had more time than days where I do have to work.

I don't miss the times before meds though, yeah I had more free time and felt energetic but I also wanted to do a bunch of terrible things.