big bad (TW sh and abuse)

i am still conquering

the need to protect you.

the way you taught me to cry

with hands clasped over my mouth

and bruises on my cheeks—

the space beneath my bed

where i hid from the monsters. 

these things are slashed into my mind

with the razor i held in my shaking hands

all those years ago, 

so sharp that the first time he yells at me

i flashback to broken bones &

the scars you hid beneath my skin.

our friends get off thinking

i’m some kind of tragic saint

when all it is is that

you gave me nightmares

i could never wake up from

& the desperate need to protect the big bad wolf.