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before i begin, i'd like to state that this story was written in inspiration of Jacob Geller's "Fear of Cold." this story serves to be an opposing side to the tales of how the cold can be seen as an equaliser and ruthless killer, just as how the heat can provide the same danger but in a seemingly different form.
I lay awake in the early morning with my eyes glued to the window, and equally, the collapsing town outside of it. The few precious hours I have left of the night serve to be my only hope to prepare for the day.
The weather is different now, as it has been for ages, and it only continues to worsen with each passing day. The temperatures between night and day have become so separate, you'd think you had just changed seasons all within a few minutes. The night has become a cruel and freezing mistress, yet still she is more manageable than the day. The day, which has now begun creeping into heat strong enough to make even the typically cold person feel as if their insides have begun to liquefy.
My days always start waking up far earlier than any normal person should, as time is essential to prepare for any salvation when the sun rises. Sleep is not frequent, nor is it plentiful anymore. I begin preparation by first ensuring that the structure of my home is still standing. Any weakness will be the destruction of the house as a whole, and me as well.
Maybe the heat would have been easier to combat if it was consistent. Fortunately, I've begun to recognise a pattern in its' behaviour. The summer months remain a dry heat as they have always been, but it is the winter I fear the most. Sweltering, humid, mucky heat. The type of humidity that make corpses decay faster than usual, the type of humidity that rots the support beams of any structure daring to be made of wood, the type of humidity that does not even leave metal as a safe alternative as it begins to crumble and rust.
This is why I am so adamant about retaining the structure of my home. The foundation of the very walls have been so unfortunately crafted of both wood and metal. Something that once would have been a great choice when temperatures were normal, but now no longer serve a useful purpose. Every morning, I always sweep through the house to make note of any rotting or rusting beams. I have no way of truly ever repairing them, but if I am aware of where they are, I can at least know enough to plan an escape route if parts of, or all of, the building were to finally collapse.
The nights do not help with the wood during the humid months. As soon as the moisture in the wood freezes, it not only makes the structure weaker, but it is also bound to melt again in the morning and leave larger cracks than there were before. I worry the most at night during humid months for this reason. When the ice expands, so do the crevices it found its' way into. Frequently, I have to fall asleep to the sound of creaking and snapping, praying that if this house were to crumble with me in it, I will not be awake for it to happen.
After going through making note of the house's integrity, I also make any additional adjustments to the airflow and what areas will be graced with shade. Any item deemed flammable in direct sunlight are moved to the shade, and any item deemed flammable in extreme heat is simply taken far away where I will not be around for it to combust. Though not even the shade is enough anymore. Nothing is, not for long at least.
Electricity does not work in this heat, as all the wires melt. This rules out the possibility of refrigerators or ice boxes being fully useful. Though, I do have a way to take advantage of them at night. When moisture collects in an open ice box, I can use it as a source of water before it fully freezes at night or boils away again by morning. The struggle in this system though, is I can never keep it in the house, or it turns any room into a sauna. The ice box is left outside under the remnants of a shed.
I have no one to talk to here. Everyone around has fled North or collapsed with their homes. The promise of colder weather in the North is all but a fairytale at this point. I wouldn't doubt that even if it had been cold there for a while, it would not be that way by now. Then again, I can't even imagine being anywhere but I am now. I don't like being alone.
The sun is up. The day begins, and so does my attempts to make it to see another night. Why do I keep going? How much longer will I fight? I would be better off to give up, I have nothing left. No one to remember my name, nothing to preserve. I've lost all material need, and so with it goes my want to survive. Instead it is replaced by a need for survival. My instincts keep me going, as self preservation is at the root of every person. Even during the most suicidal's final moments, they still make a last ditch attempt to struggle to remain alive. That is how strong it is. The heat is already setting in and the sun has only just peaked above the horizon. It is difficult to breathe. Any moisture from the air I let in begins to sizzle in my throat and lungs. It burns. My body can't take much more. I lack the strength to continue standing. My head is spinning. All I see are flashing lights and colours. My brain feels like it is detaching from it's stem. I cannot sweat anymore. I can't breathe. I cough up blood as I struggle to gasp for the violent air that torments my insides. This may be the day I give up. I am on my knees, hunched over. I can't look up. Only down, as the way my head is angled. I can't move my arms, I'm too weak. I am being cooked alive. I cannot scream. I cannot think. I can't breathe. I can't breathe I can't breathe I CAN'T BREATHE. The stress. The struggle. The pain. The heat. It's burning. It burns so much. The shade disappears. My vision turns white. My ears are ringing. I can't see. My head is pounding. The searing pain scorching me alive.
My heart stops beating.
holy shit was that something, huh? thanks to anyone who genuinely made it this far reading, seriously. even i had to take a break writing this because i was beginning to feel the desperation of the ending. fun stuff. anyways, check out the video this was inspired by, and also my other writing. promise they're not all about someone dying of heat stroke lol
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