Idk..

 I feel like people don’t care about me.. well they do.. but in a ‘lol, how are you type of way’ or when I die they would come to my funeral, but in less than a year they would definitely forget about me. I don’t have a special role in anyone’s life any more…

Actually when I get suicidal I think about my sisters.. because they are the only people that I can think of that would be affected by my death. I mean can you imagine losing your mom and then your older sister.. 

when I think of it that way it makes me want to live a little longer. I love them too much to let them suffer because of my selfishness…

But then I feel stuck.. 

I feel like….what’s next? What can I do? What do I need to do to make my life easier?

LOL! Literally nothing.

It’s fine tho