my relationship with the internet

im sitting snuggled in my bed on my laptop while writing this.. this is like the epitome of being a 16 year old teenager!!

i love the internet so much now.. i remember i was always online, the earliest time i got on the internet was at the ripe age of 10 years old and i honestly don't regret it :p  i remember i had a giant falling out with the internet, multiple times actually (partly because i was heavily depressed).. but i think that was mainly because i thought that if i stopped being so online i would get more social and in turn happier.

i mean it worked for the first two months but then i got called a weirdo by multiple people and also a lot of my relationships with people crumbled.. everyone had their own friend groups and i felt like the odd one out in every single one of them and i hated it so i kinda just gave up.

after that i went on about my business and i did my own stuff, i spend days not talking a single word to anyone other than my parents. it was really peaceful in the beginning, but as time progressed the isolation dug deeper and deeper and i was struggling more and more. on the bright side i had a load of free time to dump (not like i ever struggled with that) and i learned a lot of new things be it behavioral or technical

i used to be a really social guy, but i also was very young. i was too young to see how stupid and goofy i looked back then. i've had a falling out with a girl best friend and THEN everything went on a giant downward spiral and i was pulled down into depression. thanks to depression it feels like my whole personality grew with it and i oftentimes think that it shaped me as a person.

anyways.. i got back to being "chronically online" like a couple of weeks back and i am much more happier this way now. ive met wonderful people on this website and i am grateful that i decided to create an account here. i really love this website and how it lets me express myself shamelessly and how there are people that went through struggles similar to mine. this place brings me a lot of fun

tell me if you guys feel the same!! ure all amazing love u :v