it doesn't have to be a bad thing

i always hear people cry after their breakups saying "i'll never find anyone like him"/"i'll never have anything like that." and i get sort of upset after hearing that. not because im a bitch and cant handle simple emotions from other people but because they think that the relationship was all that someone had to give them. most of the time, the people that complain about is are young people who were together for less than 5 months and they think those months were the best thing on earth. that the person was their soulmate and they'll never find another. i get where they're coming from because i've had many experiences. but i just feel like a true connection shouldn't be replicated. it SHOULD only happen once and then that's it. it's meant to be your "true connection" because it was the only one for you. i'm not saying that you'll never find anything again, that's going against what i'm trying to say, you definitely will find another spark with someone else. it wont be like the one u had before, but that doesn't make it a bad thing. that's what's meant to happen. you aren't meant to have the same type of spark everytime. i know that at the time, people aren't thinking right because they're obviously heartbroken so they're trying to look for solutions, (and i know this is cliche) but in months, you will realize that it wasn't even a fragment of the energy you deserve. when i talk about this, I mean people who are teens or super early adults. now I feel like people make such an emphasize on the flings they had when they were 15-16. they just focus on it and that's why they're 22 and cant over the cheesy guy in ninth grade. i think that if you're 25 ish and you're still thinking about that 3 month "relationship" from almost 10 years ago, you need to some researching on yourself and why you're still stuck. you're focusing on something in the past when you were extremely immature and now you should be an emotional mature adult. and you should really think "why am i stuck on this thing?" I speak from experience because even though i am not even close to 25, I have been in the 3 month fling and i thought it was the end of my life. but it's not. i got over it, it took time, but now i can say that it was never meant to be. i'm honestly happy that i haven't found anyone like my past relationships or whatever you wanna call them. at the moment, I did but after a few months i would go like "I don't want anything like that anymore." I'm not looking for that because that's just not me. because we grow and evolve. its a natural thing for humans to do as we get older. we don't grow inwards, we grow outwards and as we're going outwards, we meet other people who are also growing in the same direction. that's why, I believe, high school sweetheart relationships don't work out. its very unlikely that you both will grow together. and that's not a bad thing, none of this is a bad thing. it's a natural way of living. if you lose the person then it's a good thing. you were never meant to keep them if you lost them. why did you lose them? were they unloyal or maybe they just weren't meeting your ideals? maybe your puzzle pieces just didn't fit? there is no "right person, wrong time." anytime would've been the right time. I think its just a way of coping. and its the same thing with thinking that you'll meet again. an ex should be someone you used to know, someone you used to be with. they shouldn't be a returning point. "oh we're broken up now, but we'll find each other later." it's over. it's a bedtime story so you can sleep at night. "no contact." you aren't talking. you're over. do not heal just to focus on returning in the future. I know some of you are probably telling me to fuck off and that I don't get it but I do. finding a new connection doesn't have to be such a negative thing. you don't have to compare or wallow because you feel like the last fling you had was the world in your eyes. things will get better, you will find something new, you will find a stronger connection or maybe just learn to live with yourself. 

idk how to end this