4th of January 2022

I never thought I'd be here for this long, but here I am, celebrating another day which is supposed to have some significance to me.

I got next to nothing from my parents, and I'm crying because of it.

I feel unwanted on my one day of the year.

My friends that I spent today with, though, got me thoughtful gifts that I thoroughly enjoy.

Soulless I watch my family grow closer together as I fade from their lives.

I am basking in the light from your halo in your presence, and I lie awake in the depths of Hell, awaiting your return.

I feel safe when I'm with my guardian angel, and when he isn't here, I feel second best. I feel ashamed, but not alone.

I cannot be conscious and happy when I'm around my family, I'm so far removed that I feel as though I could go missing tomorrow and they wouldn't be able to give an accurate police description because they forgot what I was wearing.

I feel like I'm ending on the fourth day of the year, and I can't help but wish that my Sorrows could turn to helium balloons that would fly away on the breeze.

I need an escape, whether that be through the ending of my life or a sleepover with my lover, it needs to be soon.

Published by Zagreus

4th of January 2022

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