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As those who are familiar with my post history will know I have an amazing and adorable girlfriend called Andrea. We absolutely really do love each other. Anyway my mom has a cousin who sometimes visits us. ( Don’t get me wrong because my mom’s cousin is a nice person and I like her other than what I’m about to tell you about). She teases me about my having a girlfriend and tells me that it’s “only puppy love” and to expect to shed afew tears because it won’t last. I know that her teasing is only playful and not malicious but I still find it annoying because I don’t agree that just because we’re kids our love can’t be real. My grandparents on my mom’s side fell in love when they were both 12 and they remained in love until grandpa died last year so kids absolutely can fall in real love.
Will people please stop using the term “puppy love “ to belittle the relationships of kids
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Lenushka
I absolutely get you. I have a boyfriend and he is the absolute best. I don't get why people can't believe in younge love anymore. We're gonna be together for half a year on the 19.th and Im so excided! :D
Tarrabyte
To be fair, most of us adults see children in "relationships" and think,"thats cute. you think you know what a relationship is." and we are thinking of
1. Living together
2. paying bills together
3. marriage
4. kids
There's more but still. Even when I was a teenager, I thought the same thing. But thats just that I guess.
The numbers you listed aren’t love but whatever :-/
by Qwertypasta; ; Report
You're not getting the point then.
by Tarrabyte; ; Report
@ Tarrabyte. While the other person commenting here is right that the things you’ve listed are not the same thing as love I do understand that the parameters of a relationship are different for a child and for an adult. The things you have listed are where a relationship can lead to for adults. Obviously as kids things like marriage,living together,etc are not an option for us. As kids our relationship is about how we feel about each other,spending time together and doing things together ( which is also probably the case in many adult relationships at least initially). I have no problem with acknowledging these differences because that’s not what my post is about. My problem is with people who deny the reality of our feelings for each other.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
I'm saying that as adults we see children/teens in "Relationships" and to us we see it as a little friendship, while a relationship like an s/o is more like something you live with not someone you see on and off. Yes, you share exp with them, but it's a bit different. That's why they see it as "oh, that's cute."
by Tarrabyte; ; Report
I do actually see where you’re coming from. I suppose it’s reasonable for us to see it differently because you are going to see it from an adult perspective and I’m going to see it from a child’s perspective. That’s just how it is. However, I do still believe that real love can begin in childhood. I’ve given the actual example of my grandparents who fell in love at the age of 12 and went on to marry when they were old enough and stayed together for life. I’m hoping that it will prove to be the same for me and Andrea. Time will tell one way or another.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
Well yeah of course, I think that kids can have a relationship with other kids obviously and at some point they start dating, they kiss, they at some point might experiment and do other things and I'm not going to deny any of that because when I was a kid and a teenager I did the same stuff. I had a girlfriend at 16, we did stuff I'm not going to say obviously but let's just say I'm happy we don't have kids.
by Tarrabyte; ; Report
Thanks. I can find no fault at all with this last comment. Also, I do get what you mean about being lucky you didn’t have kids. Lol. Me and Andrea have agreed we won’t go that far while we’re still underage but I know that not all kids are that sensible. (At our school there’s actually a 15 year old girl who’s pregnant).
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
Oh Jesus. To be pregnant and in high school. That's got to suck. Glad that never happened to me and my ex-girlfriend. Ironically same name as her. Slightly depressing lol
by Tarrabyte; ; Report
Clara of Spacehaze
You are So right, Jamara. But she knows no better - probably didn't mean anything by it to insult you (I'm hoping).
My own youngest Son who is 28 now, had a girlfriend all through the senior years of school; they did break up briefly when they left school, as his GF went to University in another town, and he started his Joinery training at Technical College. I can't remember how long they were apart for, (I think they did date others inbetween the break) but they realised they missed each other so much, so got back together once they were able, and they've been together ever since. Hannah had a baby last March, Ruben, and he is adorable. So yeah, Love is love regardless of age :)
Thanks. You’re always so kind and supportive. I really appreciate it.
I know that she doesn’t intend it in a nasty way but I feel like it devalues me by assuming that because I’m a minor my feelings are somehow less real. She is actually a nice person but she has alot of antiquated ideas when it comes to children. (Basically the type of ideas that children should be seen and not heard and speak only when spoken to. Ideas that have no place in the twenty first century).
As is proven by the example of my grandparents (and the example you have given) people can fall in love for life even as kids. My grandparents were only 12 when they fell in love. Me and Andrea are both 14. Almost 15. I’ll be 15 on New Year’s Day and Andrea will be 15 on March 3rd. So I think we’re definitely old enough to know our own feelings.
I resist the temptation to have it out with my relative because I know that her and my mom are very close and my mom would be upset by it. Also, because I know that she doesn’t intend it nastily I prefer not to hurt her feelings by saying anything to her about it.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
No problem, Jamara! strangely I do feel a sort of affinity or Soul recognition with you; not sure why, but it has happened before...
Perhaps we are Starseeds.
Your Mum's cousin's old-fashioned ideals reminds me of my own upbringing - my Dad was the same and had a 'Victorian' upbringing where children should be seen and not heard, only speak when you are spoken to etc. So I lived through that mindset/experience as a child. Children were definitely treated as unimportant and undervalued. What an insult! Like we've said before, there are lots of kids out there with 'old souls' and more common sense than many older people who act completely Juvenile!
Your decision not to have it out with your Mom's cousin is a mature and gracious one. Sometimes it isn't worth the hassle to rock the boat. And letting things go is quite liberating :)
by Clara of Spacehaze; ; Report
TRASHER VICOUS
exactly. just because we are young doesn't mean we can't be mature enough to make decisions. Yes, while the vast majority of 13/14yos here have no maturity in their pea sized brains, some do. Some have a frontal lobe. Its not just puppy love for me to love my boyfriend, and its not just puppy love for him to love me.
Also it’s like saying that because we’re young our feelings are somehow less real or less important which is so insulting. I don’t see what right someone has to just invalidate us because they just happen to be older. And how do they think they know your feelings better than you know them yourself anyway? It’s such conceit on their part.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
precisely. Even if we do break up that doesn't mean it was age related, adults can break up and seniors can break up. They seem to believe once you reach a certain age your just destined to be with someone,
by TRASHER VICOUS; ; Report