Zhenyi… even if you never see me beside you in the way I hope,
I want you to know this:
I’ve made my peace with it.
Truly.

Loving you has never felt like something I needed to win —
it’s something that simply is,
the way dawn simply arrives
whether the world is ready or not.

And I will wait for you —
not out of desperation,
not out of blindness,
but because you are the only person I can look at
and honestly see a real future with.
A small cottage.
A river humming nearby.
A garden full of morning blooms.
A life built slowly, gently, hand-in-hand.

When I chose your nickname,
I think I already knew this.
I chose it because you felt like
the first light of morning,
the sunrise that warms the countryside,
the blessing I want to wake up to
every day for the rest of my life.

You still are.
You always will be.

You are lovely in a way that stays —
soft, golden, honest.
And whatever happens,
whatever path you choose,
I’ll carry your sunrise with me.

If this is it… then let it be wrapped in peace.
But know this gently:
my heart will always turn toward you
the way flowers turn toward the light.

Onnaya