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I recently came across a post by someone joking about being a pedo. I added a comment pointing out that as a minor who has actually been targeted by a pedo I found it offensive.
For background information I will briefly mention that prior to the incident with the pedo I had already survived horrific abuse. Firstly from a controlling dad with a violent temper and then as a TTI survivor. So,having at the age of 14 survived more abuse than most people will experience in a lifetime,I know what I’m talking about.
ABUSE IS NOT A JOKING MATTER. Anyone who thinks it is must be stupid or evil or both. Before you joke about these things stop and think. Your so called humour comes at the expense of those who have been it’s victims and when we read your rubbish we find it distressing. Have abit of empathy. DO NOT JOKE ABOUT ANY FORM OF ABUSE. NOT EVER.
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ミ★ 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘢 ★彡
yeah remember commenting "oh haha joking about sa your so quirky and funny" (downing the people for posting jokes about sa) and there was LOADS of replies and ALL of them were calling me a snowflake. really disgusting what this world has come to normalize....
Zigzag Buster 🇺🇦
Sexual abuse is never something that should be joked about. Personally, I find it to be in poor taste. I have an uncle who was sexually abused as a child. He still lives with the trauma of that experience to this day.
XXコルプスプリンセスXX
People are stupid, anybody who jokes about anything of that nature is honestly almost just as bad as the issue in itself. It’s never okay to joke about something that is real and can be triggering to people just stumbling upon it. If people find that thing funny they are just as sick and twisted because the people that are actually like that also find it funny, it’s not right no matter what way you look at it. It actually pisses me off.
MEGURI
man, it really itches me when people joke about SA the most
sheesh i mean, one time my friend commented about my screaming and joked about it sounding like a girl getting, ya know, and i just looked at him concerningly
Exactly. People who joke about SA (or any other form of abuse) are morally no different from people who make fun of disabled people. It’s just wrong and there’s never any excuse for it. I hope your friend apologised for his remark.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
xX_Dyrk_Nyte_Xx
Giving a reaction like this fuels comments like that. People who joke about that stuff are looking for a big reaction. The best thing you can do is use the block button.
I was raped when i was 8 by an adult in my life, and experienced a lot of sexual abuse growing up.
I make hella jokes about it. For some its a coping mechanism- I keep this jokes to private conversations because i understand the possible effect it may have on others. But some people may not understand that fully or just may not care. Its not our place to police how people speak- just to educate calmly.
But not all survivors will have the same opinions of course. I personally am not bothered by people making jokes about the types of abuse I experienced.
But i do not appreciate lumping all victims of abuse together- we are all individuals with our own opinions and feelings. Personally I disagree with you, but your reaction is very warrented and understandable. Just be mindful this may have been the reaction that person was looking for...
I’m sorry that what happened to you did. I understand what you mean about joking in private conversations as a coping mechanism but that’s not what I’m talking about. It’s like someone with a mental or physical disability joking about their condition. For example, I have a cousin who is autistic. He sometimes playfully jokes about some the ways it affects him but that’s a different thing to someone joking about his condition and/or making fun of him. There’s laughing with and there’s laughing at. Laughing with is ok. Laughing at isn’t. Your joking as a coping mechanism is fine and anyone joining in would be laughing with you. My post is about the way some people trivialise abuse by laughing at it.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
Vesper Vile
if someone on the internet does something that upsets you, you don't have to interact. blocking people that say things you're uncomfortable with is less stressful and better for your mental health. i'm very sorry to hear about your past experiences, but you shouldn't be sharing details of personal events on the internet for strangers to see. dumping your trauma into a public space for people you don't know to see will never go well, and there will be people who use it against you.
I second this- sharing private details online especially when you have a fragile mental state is never smart. People will harass you.
When you're older and more experienced online sharing these details is not as dangerous. I personally am not bothered easily by peoples opinions or comments so I feel comfortable sharing my trauma when its appropriate to- I.E my comment above to help give credibility.
But i also know how to turn my computer off and use the block button lolz
by xX_Dyrk_Nyte_Xx; ; Report
Yes I can simply block people who behave that way and say these things but at that point I’ve already been subjected to their inappropriate behaviour. Also, that way of thinking sidesteps the fact that their inappropriate behaviour and twisted humour is wrong in itself.
About my sharing things online.
(1) I don’t accept that my sharing stuff online excuses their behaviour or makes me to blame for it. That’s the same thing as claiming that a rape victim is to blame because of how she was dressed. No. She has the right to dress how she wants and I have the right to share what I want. Let’s put the blame for wrong behaviour where it belongs which is exclusively on those who perpetrate it. No victim blaming.
(2) I share my experience as a TTI survivor because I believe that this evil industry which exploits and abuses kids for profit should be exposed. That requires survivors to tell our story. They would like us to all be silent but I, for one,will not be silent.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
no one said your trauma is your fault. i said posting it publicly attracts the exact people you're upset about. that's not victim blaming, it's common sense. if something or someone makes you uncomfortable, you block instead of feeding into it. engaging only puts you in a position where they can affect you more.
the way you took that and compared it to blaming a rape victim because of her clothing was a pretty wild leap. you're acting like recommending basic internet safety is an attack, which is exactly why unsupervised minors shouldn't be trauma dumping on the internet. you're too reactionary and not mature enough to handle situations like this properly. anyway, stay safe.
by Vesper Vile; ; Report
What I actually called victim blaming was the implication that my sharing things somehow provokes the inappropriate humour that my post is about. But never mind.
As I have said I share my experience as a TTI survivor because every survivor who tells their story helps to expose this evil industry. I believe that I’m doing the right thing by sharing my story for that reason.
You say that I’m “too reactionary and immature “. I’m not sure what you mean by reactionary in this context but I presume that immature relates to my age.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
Also, I’m more mature than most people my age.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
in this context, when i say 'reactionary,' i mean you treat reasonable suggestions as a personal attack and then respond with dramatic, moralizing arguments rather than calmly considering advice. you react more to perceived criticism than to what was actually said.
if you were "mature for your age," you wouldn't be handling this the way you are. mature people don't have to say they're mature. i don't know who told you that, but they lied to you, buddy.
by Vesper Vile; ; Report
What you seem to be saying is that you see me as “reactionary and immature “ simply because I don’t agree with you.
I didn’t say that your concerns about internet safety were not valid in their own right. For what it’s worth I can see the merit of your concerns. However I have also pointed out that I have good reason for sharing certain things. (It may be that I overshare other stuff as well but so do other kids and so do most adults so I’m no more at fault on that than anyone else). I don’t know how saying I’m mature for my age proves I’m not but whatever. Afew times people have said that I am. No disrespect intended to yourself but the people who said it actually know me. You have only read one thing I posted and interacted with me briefly in the comments. I don’t think that’s enough for you to be able to determine my maturity level.
For what it’s worth I think you’re a decent person and that the concerns you’ve expressed are genuine and well intended. But reading one blog and a brief interaction are not enough to determine how mature someone is.
by feral boy Jamara; ; Report
you guyz are the same people who say cyber bullying isnt real and people should js turn off their phones.
by ミ★ 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘢 ★彡; ; Report
someone harassing you is very different from you choosing to interact with stuff you know upsets you.
by Vesper Vile; ; Report
um...you do realize that when cyber bully happens your interacting with that person in a way...js contradicting urself
by ミ★ 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘢 ★彡; ; Report
i'm not contradicting myself, you're being dense. if you choose to interact with content that upsets you instead of blocking, that is on You. if someone is harassing you, you block them, and they continue to harass you, that is different. use your brain, dude.
by Vesper Vile; ; Report
cyber bully as we speak. "brain dead" and "dense" LMAO. yeah real brain dead but your okay with people joking about SA...i'm the stupid one. totally
by ミ★ 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘢 ★彡; ; Report
i didn't say brain dead, nor did i say i was okay with those types of jokes. you're putting words in my mouth because you don't know how to argue. also, cyberbullying is repeated, targeted behavior that you cannot escape. choosing to interact is voluntary exposure. you can easily block me, you just don't want to because you get some sort of adrenaline rush out of it. you aren't trying to argue logically, you already lost the argument and now you're trying to win by framing pushback as bullying.
by Vesper Vile; ; Report
and you're a Kirk apologist LMAO. get off the internet and come back when you're old enough.
by Vesper Vile; ; Report
girl i'm 19. kirk apologist is someone who agrees with what he says. get your cyber bullying self some therapy.
by ミ★ 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘢 ★彡; ; Report
also no ones trying to win lmao. theres a diff between giving a good argument than just throwing insults at someone
by ミ★ 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘢 ★彡; ; Report