DAY 11 >w0

there's not really a lot i can say anymore except i'm constantly working on assignments. nothing gives me joy anymore lmfaooo and i feel so lonely, so desperately lonely and it's hard to be alive anymore. i think i'm stuck like this forever.

there's just so much i need to do, there's so much i WANT to do. but i'm so horribly mentally ill and whenever i wake up i realize just how alone i am. not even my roommate is home. i'm a mirror of other people, and without companionship i am nothing. 

i don't understand how people actually like me. tolerate me? that i can understand, i've known my entire life that people really care for what i can provide. it's really pathetic, i want to be able to trust in my friends without it being so painful for me. everything i do is a fucking lie and i should die for it.