After all, catharsis, crises, depression, regret, hells and mental abysses, direct falls into hell, physical and mental suffering, so much, all of it, all for what?

You see life as an achievement, surviving, but not nature, but your mind and environment, going through so much, your eyes see things and more things, your whole life, your mind is molded over time to cope with this, surviving is the key to happiness, never say dead, because even if you think you're on the ramp directly to the abyss, you may actually be walking towards the light, the illuminated door may be so close...

You can die without knowing that the answer to everything was right in front of you, but that there was a lens that prevented you from seeing it... or that simply, nothing ever existed.

The stairway to heaven opens for you after you open that white door, after walking into that light. You may not realize it, but perhaps you're already in heaven. Perhaps you're at your point of ascending to heaven. Perhaps all that suffering was worth it, the rains, and all that walking, swimming, watching things you might consider important go by. Perhaps, behind all that, there's the light. But is this light really that good?

After all that walking, after everything, you see nothing but darkness, and you fall into the abyss, a deeper one, into a cycle of falling and falling.

You'll never know. Everything can be so sudden. One day you're in heaven and the next you're in hell, but in the end, you've arrived where that same river took you. All that effort, all that work, is for something. Maybe the stairway to heaven is real or not. You've been through so much. All your luck can be reflected in something.

You disappear or you remain, that's how things are defined. You disappear from everything, and you become someone free... or tormented by the same past, something that perhaps pulls you from heaven to hell, or makes you rise higher. Maybe your only way out is in hatred, hope, or escape, but is it worth overcoming all of the above for this?

Everything is so relative to each person.

Or you can fall into limbo, fall into what will bring you back, or perhaps see the light directly, pretend to be someone you're not, fall to a side where you really don't know who you are, where. Either you fall, or the same character consumes you.

But both lead to one thing: questioning and seeing yourself, an identity crisis, a direct fall into the knife, and you may fall back on the same path you came from.

The mind is all a game, a game of chance.