friendship

i've been trying to look on the bright side of things

i may be a complete loser still, but at least i'm trying to become better

i've still got some good friends

like three maybe

why is it so hard to make friends

how did i do it so easily before??

maybe its just really easy when you're a kid

or maybe i just wasnt socially inept when i was younger

maybe i should join a club, but i also dont know if that'd even succeed in my efforts to make more friends

friendship is truly beautiful

and yet i've messed up or thrown away so many friendships

i hope all my past friends are doing better

especially you, richerd, even if you did accuse me of doing the most f**ed up thing ever

i wish you the best

its so hard to improve, but i'm gonna keep trying

maybe one day i wont look back at the past with regret anymore

i'll look back at it with acceptance, maybe even gratitude

but that day is not today, it seems

aaaaaaaaa