Advice and Tips on Self Improvment

okay so this is gonna be a list of things I've done which have helped me in different ways that may help someone else

Also PLEASE keep in mind that i am only 14 not 400 i don't have a whole lot of experience but from the stuff i do have and the advice from older people these things have helped me out in being better 

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1. Keeping a Student Planner/Personal Calendar

Since i used to be (and technically still am) addicted to social media anything i did in a day was completely forgotten, to the point where i couldn't remember certain events that happened at the end of the day 

So to fix this problem i bought a dollar store student planner 

the black one top left to be specific

 Every single day i write in it about things I've done and there are notes at the back to write about major events

Now this helps with memory because it requires to think back to what you did and mark important dates since its also a calendar, i have even began tracking my cycles (since i don't trust apps) and it has helped tremendously. here is an example of how i use it:

granted my life isn't super exciting but its helped with memory problems and making my life a bit more interesting since i try to do one fun or good thing a day to not be bored to death

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2. Vent Book/Papers

yes i know very original (◔_◔) but here's the thing 

when writing about your day when the book is done or full you tend to get attached since it's all your feelings from the year(s) or however long but when rereading your memories you don't want to remember the bad 

so

write on papers or something you plan to throw away

so bam therefore you don't get attached and therefore let go of whatever was causing stress or anger 

a lot of people are miserable because they hold onto it but if you want to get better you can't do that! constantly move forward for better never in the past for grieving something you shouldn't miss if a memory was truly that awful then your brain will remember it but the pages shouldn't remind you 

(personally i like to burn my papers but throwing them out works too the point it to let go)

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3.Thinking Logically about Emotions 

okay this one is going to be a bit harder to explain but here me out

Understanding emotions is crucial to regulating them and to understand emotions you have to think logically 

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i can't walk through finding out emotions with someone but whenever your upset keep these things in mind (I'll go more in depth below the list)

1. You are never going to not feel an emotion 

2. Always try to cool down before staring an argument 

3. Understand when upset (mostly anger) an outlet in which you can control something is best

4. Never assume what someone will say before they do 

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here's a bit of elaboration 

1- in whatever situation you cant not feel emotion, even if you feel guilty it's easier and better in the long run to work out any emotions.

 since bottled up emotions never work out  in the history of living, and feeling guilty about feeling something never fixes the situation at hand and doesn't fix any problem that may be now.

2- sometimes arguments have to happen agree to disagree at times, and sometimes seeing how someone really feels about a situation.

 although everyone may wish for peaceful conversations life doesn't always work that way so talk with a level head if possible and even if not in the moment always understand the situation at best

3- finding an outlet can be hard, everyone is different  but its important to understand that most anger comes from being out of control of a situation.

 Lack of control of your own life causes stress so in most cases to ease its best to find outlets where you have full control (e.g. cleaning, writing, drawing, walking alone) these things give time to also sort out emotions for things like pent up energy some sort of physical activity (i personally walk to sort it out) 

4- ASSUME MAKES AN ASS OUT OF U AND ME, that's how you spell assume ass-u-me. 

But on a serious note, if in a situation where you have to confront somebody prepare for a bad outcome but don't fantasize about it and assume what the other person may do or say. And never wait too long because it may ruin something later or you may regret something, i talk to older people enough to know that everyone mostly regrets never saying something in life and plus the amount of relief you'll feel is worth it  even if it sucks in the moment 

(yes some regret telling but in majority most regret never telling)

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