tough luck, buttercup, or something like that.

I feel like with people who are less willing to extend sympathy,

there is this voice that tells them,

"Tough Luck! You just gotta deal with it."

And that's true, maybe to an extent,

but also a really terrible motivator. At least, for me.

Some things really fuck you up in the head and without the proper tools and help to deal with it you're left to rot, basically, unless you pull yourself up by the roots and keep going forward despite it.

But to do that, to get to that grandiose event of Finally Healing and Being Free,,,

you have to realize that there isn't one.

It doesn't exist.

There is no big instant turnaround in your life that fixes everything.

Not to say that,, you have to be sad forever,

or to ignore the things that hurt you or to give up on being better altogether,,

none of that is what I'm saying.

I'm just saying that change is gradual, often unseen, and what may pass by as years may only be a smidge of progress in your eyes.

It's not something you chase from start to end.

There is no completion of it, only repeated upkeep, repair, learning to ride by it smoother, easier, more efficiently, more comfortably.

There are times where it's worse, and times when the pain is barely even visible,

 but it haunts through you like a mad ghost.

Your goal is not to kill an unkillable creature, but to learn to live with it in a way that doesn't constantly scare you.

And with your effort, when you expand your life to make space for one you enjoy, when you fill your life with the important things that give you goodness and brings goodness to others,,

when you help yourself and let others help you, 

that ghost can become small and unimportant in your life.

It's no one size fits all, and there most certainly isn't a 100% cure for it.

It helps me to remind myself once in a while that, even if it hurt, and it still sometimes hurts, I can't let it hurt me forever, and I most certainly won't let it hurt me now.

I'm not here to preach or to tell people what to say, this is just one of those self-reminders, I guess.

bye-bye, and have a good day, whenever that is.