Still Loving

Should I be grateful,

or should I curse 

This strange, stubborn truth

that even after all the misfortune,

all the breaking,

all the pieces scattered across years of ache,

I can still feel love.

Sometimes it feels like a blessing,

like light that refuses to die out,

even in the darkest corners of me.

Other times,

it feels like a cruel trick,

to still carry a heart

that opens itself

after everything it has endured.

I don’t know if love makes me strong,

or if it only makes me foolish

to hope,

to give,

to keep reaching out

when I’ve been burned before.

But here I am,

still capable of it.

Still holding it.

Still letting it live in me,

no matter how many times

the world tells me not to.

So tell me

should I thank the heavens for this softness,

or curse the sky

for making me bleed and bloom

at the same time?

-dmnd