SEPTEMBER 9 2025 LIFE UPDATE

tw for losers i guess. self-harm, eating problems, sleeping problems not in detail but yeah

IMPORTANT!!!!! I AM NOT WHO I WAS 3 MONTHS AGO!!! I CHANGE DAY BY DAY!!! DON'T COMPARE ME TO MY PAST SELF THAS NOT EVEN ME!!!

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i had to protect my heart,
and built a wall so tall,
i couldn't look over

tyler, the creator - ring ring ring

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been a while since my last life update hasnt it. no one's gonna read this so it's okay

what's up? my name's skittle. i go by ash too but it's pretty experimental. i went by that name a few years ago too, so it's pretty personal to me. i'm transgender and i go by he/him!

let me start by saying my november is right now*. so, my life wasn't really going that great but it's definitely started to pick up now! this month's the happiest i've been all year. yes i still live with my stupid parents cuz i'm still a minor and i did fall out with my best friend and lots of things irrationally piss me off, but it's all okay, because i either don't care or can drown it out in positive things! i've been friends with these people online for a while but we weren't that close until we all either got banned from or left a specific discord server (literal hell btw). i must say my life has improved significantly after leaving that place and focusing on my friends more. their names are katoptro (with an accent mark i cant type), henry and lagster. we've been tryna start a virtual band but we all are kinda ass at fl studio BUT IT'S OKAY!! we'll get somewhere someday <3 i looove them to death they're who i would consider my best friends. they're kind of what keep me going now, along with music. I LOVE THEM!! they're generally really awesome and funny and i wish they knew how much they mean to me.

school started last month, which i'm not a big fan of, but i'm on that "just make it to friday" grind so yeah. i'm on top of my assignments and shit and i do enough to get by which i guess is fine. parents still stress me out about it but who cares really.

my friends, particularly lagster, have introduced me to a fuck ton of new things, such as:

-music, like hip-hop and rap for example
   -jpegmafia
   -tyler, the creator
   -joey valence & brae (kinda? i liked them for a while but only just started becoming a fan)
-shows
   -girls' last tour, an anime
   -uhhhhhhh... that's probably it. i heavily enjoy music
specially tyler , i looooooove tyler, im a newgen but its ok his music means a lot to me. i like "flower boy", "igor" and "don't tap the glass", no particular order. i love listening to music my friends recommend.

i fell out with someone i thought i'd be best friends with forever, but it's okay. people come and go. he was boring as fuck anyway, feel like i forced myself to like him, he was cringey as hell too. i wont lie i preferred when he was really dry. lol

it's my birthday in 2 months and i legitimately didn't think i'd be alive but HERE I AM! WOOOO!!!!!! not that stoked about it but at least i lived another year. <3 i've been 8 MONTHS CLEAN OF SELF HARM! AND I PLAN TO KEEP IT THAT WAY! you can still see the scars if you look hard enough, and weirdly they function both as something that brings me anxiety and motivation. like yeah i lived but also why did i do that and i'll never do it again. my relationship with food's def getting better, at least the mere thought of it doesnt make me wanna throw up anymore now, but im regaining my sleep problems FUCK! i only stay up late cuz thats when i get alone time away from everyone (family) the only place i can truly be myself is the internet. made a priv twitter to vent my feelings and i gotta say this shit is straight up free therapy holy shit like i feel better than ever it's like my own little internet diary that only select people can read

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i adore the person i'm growing into and while i do think negatively of myself every now and then i mostly really like myself now (particularly after dropping that fag lol. it was a mutually harmful friendship) and sometimes i really can't believe how awesome i am. when i get to transition it's OVER for y'all.

yeah, my friends and music are what i'm staying alive a little longer for. i love them so much. cheers to this month, let's pray it's a good one (or better than april at least)!!!!!!! until next time <3

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(*tyler, the creator - november (album: "flower boy", an awesome album) | a song about a meaningful time in one's life, particularly one where one is nostalgic for it. my november's right now, meaning this is an awesome time period of my life!)