🥣 Cooking With Noah, Part 7: I Made Lentils and Tried to Pretend I’m Adulting

Posted by: Noah (who now owns a pot that isn’t dented)
Date: July 11, 2025

I decided to make lentils today.
Because I figured if I can make something cheap, warm, and edible, maybe I can convince myself that I’m not completely failing at life.
Also, lentils take forever, so I had plenty of time to think about everything I’ve done wrong. Perfect.

🥄 Ingredients for Existential Comfort:

• 1 cup lentils (dry, but full of potential)

• 1 carrot, diced (color in an otherwise gray life)

• 1 potato, diced (soft and forgiving)

• 1 small onion, chopped (optional tears)

• 1 clove garlic, minced (for flavor, or courage, or both)

• Olive oil, salt, pepper

• Water or broth (depends if I’m fancy today)

• A sprinkle of thyme or bay leaf (to pretend I’m not sad)

🔥 Step 1: Sauté the Basics

Heated some oil.
Added onions and garlic.
Smelled the smell.
Paused to wonder if anyone would ever cook for me like this.
Shrugged. Added carrots and potatoes. Sautéed until slightly softened.

💧 Step 2: Simmer Into Something

Added lentils and covered everything with water.
Brought it to a boil, then simmered on low heat.
Let it bubble quietly.
Watched the steam fog the kitchen window.
Felt… mildly hopeful. Or maybe that was the heat.

🥄 Step 3: Stir and Season Life

After 30–40 minutes, lentils were soft.
Added salt, pepper, and thyme.
Tasted.
It wasn’t amazing.
It wasn’t terrible.
It was… survival. And sometimes survival is enough.

🖤 Final Thoughts From Lentil-Noah:

Lentils are humble.
They don’t pretend to be fancy.
They just exist, quietly nourishing anyone willing to put in the work.

Maybe I’m like that too.
Quiet, slow, cheap… but somehow edible in a world that often isn’t.

So yeah. I made lentils.
And for today, that counts as adulting.