more edgy ventslop

very much so on the verge of giving up with everyone and everything a little more everyday!!!!! if i were living alone this  would be so much easier but no I have to be all happy joyous whimsy so no one worries about me cause i hate it when my family worries about me cause theyll just start blaming thesmevles like everyone else i know like fuckoff you should Get it by nowthis is My fault and you havenothing to do with it ok cool! its so fucking annoying everoyne is annoying i tried sleeping this day off but i  cant im so desperate for interaction yet im so unbearable no one wants to talk to me no one will ever talk to me without saying some mean shit and i dont wantthat but i deserve it so im not winning ever anyways this is so fucking infuriating i hate myself and everything ever

i need to work for the things that i want but i have no intention on doing so so i am just going to sit here with a bunch of hopes and dreams forever and i dont want anyone worrying or caring there are so many people in the world go care about them. im irrelevant and im a loser. and i will be that way forever

someone once said that i was scared of having someone stick around with me and idfk why i am like this sso every reason ever is the Right one i dont know i have such a fuckingheadache and i want interaction but i need to be alonecause i suck and stuff its no oness fault but mine ok cool yeadontcareabpoutme thanks

crucial part i hate about all ofthis is that it makes me uncontrollably shake which makes me sick and ill itsso annoying thisis all infuriating and all im gonn ado is bitch and complain like why is it such a bad thing when i sayiwanna kill myself i think thatwould solve everyones problems atp ok