"STAIRCASE." --Story I wrote. (Got bored, drank, wrote a story.)

DATE:03/10/21.

20:01:

It's a dark, cold night just like any other, the sky's pitch black with stars sparkling like scattered glitter, and the moon looks as if it was all but eaten with just a corner left behind, with the dullest of light shining.

The night is colder than usual, and I can feel the goosebumps piercing through the skin under my jacket as the wind hits me with a force that almost knocked me off my feet.

The wind's strange, light one minute; pushing me the next, almost like my angry, toxic ex. Bitch.

22:34

I was working hard at my job as I do, Boss. If you're reading my diary again.

Taking care of a graveyard was harder than I thought it'd be when I first took the job, but at least it was peaceful most nights, and I didn't have to deal with any Karens. Only Karens I dealt with were already dead and 6 feet deep.

I always thought someone was looking at me, touching me, talking to me, I even saw things, objects, animals, shadows, people, every now and again.

But ever since I got diagnosed with hallucinations, the noises, the strange wind, the things I saw and felt, all of it, I'm used to. Although it terrified me, I knew it wasn't real, and I no longer felt crazy.

But still, I wanted to run as fast as I could home, jump into my bed, hide under my blanket like it's a shield and be safe from them all, even if they do follow me home. 

DATE: 04/10/21.

00:00:

Halfway through my shift, it's finally time for my hour break. I have a nice hot cup of tea, a crisp sandwich, and an apple, begging to be devoured.

I'm having a pretty good shift today, no noises, no stranger winds than usual, not even one hallucination. 

Never mind, it was nice while it lasted. I see a staircase in the middle of the graveyard again, leading up through the grey clouds and up to the stars.

Normally, Mrs and Mr Gravell's graves are there, but they're not anywhere to be seen when the staircase appears. Only this time, the stairs looked real, so much more real than before. 

I put my drink and Bob the Builder lunch box down and slowly stepped towards the staircase. I slowly put my hand out, reaching towards them to see if the stairs were real, when I was just about to touch them, I heard a Yell from behind me.

"Oi! watcha doin'? You left your food for the birds!" Yelled, my Boss as he walked to me from the office.

My Head turned quicker than an owl in surprise. I stood up straight and looked at him. 

"Yeah sorry! I got a bit distracted by the staircase," I chuckled awkwardly, rubbing the back of my neck.

He gave me a look and said, "That imaginary staircase, again?"

I turned back, and it was gone, not a splinter nor step in sight. "Uh yeah, but not anymore, I guess," I replied.

"What on earth do you put in your tea?" mumbled my boss, thinking I couldn't hear him, "Well make sure you eat before the birds do," He said before heading towards his office.

"Sure thing!" I replied, yelling so he could hear me, For a man with a dodgy leg he sure does move like his life depends on it.

06:41:

My boss has left to go home to see his wife and kids for breakfast, which means I'm stuck looking after the graveyard and his office until he gets back.

Luckily, I get paid for overtime, and I'm classing this as overtime.

07:02:

I was walking around the graveyard as I always do, making sure everything's alright and no high teenagers have tried to dig no one up again. And to see if that cat has returned that always pisses on Mr and Mrs Gravell's graves.

07:31:

My boss should be on his way back by now.

I clocked out, ready to go home. On my way out, there, I saw it once again, the staircase with the sun was slowly clawing its way out of slumber from behind it.

I couldn't resist, I walked up to the staircase, closed my eyes and stomped my foot on the first step, thinking it'll just go away like it always does, only this time, I was wrong.

I opened my eyes to see my foot firmly on the step. I just stared at my foot. I couldn't believe it, it was real this time.

I took a deep breath and started to climb the stairs, slowly, keeping my eyes on the steps just above the ones where my feet lay.

They just kept going, I started counting each step, and I was curious about how many there were, and where they were leading to.

08:47:

I think I lost my mind, I can't stop counting. I can't stop climbing these steps, not yet. 

It's like I'm a passenger in my own body. I can feel the steps under my boot, and I can feel the icy wind piercing my face like needles, but no matter how hard I try, I can't stop, I don't want to, not yet.

DATE: 06/10/21.

02:23:

It's been 2 days since I started climbing the stairs, and I still don't want to stop counting or climbing, even though by this time my boots have begun to wear away. I feel like I should be in pain, but I don't feel anything, not even the wind's harsh kisses anymore. Not yet.

DATE: 05/11/21.

17:10:

After 30 days of climbing the stairs, I've noticed that the bottom of my boots has worn away, and I'm now walking the stairs with just socks. 

But I still don't want to stop, not yet. I'll reach the top soon, I'm sure. I don't dare look up, not yet. I don't want to take my eyes off the steps in case I slip. It's not exactly like this staircase has handrails or anything.

DATE: 06/10/22.

12:02:

It's been a year, I've been climbing and counting for a year now. I'll reach the top soon, I'll stop then, just not yet.

The skin on the bottom of my feet has worn away, and some of the muscle too. I think I'm leaving bloody footprints behind me, yet as I carry on, I notice that the bloodied prints I leave behind me are in front of me.

I think I'm stuck in a loop of sorts, but I don't want to slip. I'll keep my eyes on these steps for a little longer.

Just not yet.

16:31:

I can feel the pain from walking now, and it's agonising, but I can't stop, not the walking, not the counting, not yet. I must know.

The sun hasn't moved since I started. I'm now on step 98,535,360. Just a few more to the top, I know it. I can't stop, not yet.

DATE: 06/11/27.

04:20:

It's now been 5 years? I think. I can't feel my feet anymore, I don't even see them in the edge of my view anymore.

I've been walking so much my feet must've worn away or something. It's like I'm walking on the bones of my legs now; the pain is unbearable. It feels like my bone is being pushed up and into my knees. But I'm so close, I know it, I can't stop yet. Not yet.

I'm on step 551,789,760.

DATE: 10/11/40.

23:10:

It's been 13 years since my last entry, I think anyway, it's hard to keep track. It feels like my legs have completely gone. I am having to continue climbing the stairs with my forearms and hands, my elbows, while I'm writing this, though.

My loop theory was wrong, I've passed people, other people on these stairs, and most of them are dead..?, at least from what I could see in the edges and corners of my eyes as I passed them. They didn't have any limbs, just torsos and heads. At least it explains why I thought my footprints were in front of me. Maybe I'm just going mad, but I can't stop, not yet.

I'm so glad, I'm so close! I can feel it. I can't stop now, not when I'm this close, not yet. I am now on step 1,730,333,760 

DATE: 12/12/41.

05:54:

I'm gonna look up. I can't wait to see what I'm this close to now! I think I should wait a minute and prepare myself. I'm so excited. Ever since I started climbing these stairs, I haven't had a single hallucination.

The stairs have been talking to me, helping me keep count, encouraging me to climb further. They told me once I was close enough I could look up, and today they finally said it. They said I'm close enough! Only now, I don't want to look up, not yet. I want to look up once I've reached the top, I want to see what I've waited so long for, what I've spent years climbing to. Just a bit further, I can't stop. Not yet, not when I'm now on step 1,829,013,600, not yet.

DATE: 23/12/41.

14:32:

They're angry. I don't understand. They keep screaming at me. I wanted to stop for a second, but no. Not yet, I can't stop yet. I have to wait for when I'm up there. I feel close, so.. so close. There's no one in front of me anymore; I think I've surpassed everybody. How'd they get up here anyway? This is my staircase. It speaks to me! I count its steps. ME.

I can barely think. All I want to do is count. All I can think about is getting to the top. I haven't even eaten in years. Yet I don't feel hungry. Hell, I don't feel anything, nothing, just a need. A force. Pulling me to count. To climb. Once I'm at the top, I'll just wait a little longer, I can't stop. Not yet.

DATE: 03/01/42.

1:00:

The stairs have stopped talking to me. They stopped helping me count. They said it was my turn. Turn for what? It doesn't matter. All that matters is getting to the top. All I need is to know how many steps I take and what's up there. That's what I want. I need it. I don't think I can live with myself if I never knew. If I turned back now, what would there be? Nothing. Nothing is as important as this. Here. Now. What else could I possibly want?

DATE: 12/01/45.

06:21:

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