Vent 3

Today I dreamt that my mother told me to cut myself and when i said no she cut my arm herself. The scary thing is that when I woke up I heard a voice that told me to cut myself over and over again. Luckily I ran to my father so I did not hurt myself. I even gave him my spare blades that I hid for times like this to hurt myself. I know that its bad but I somehow regret that I gave him the blades. 

Rn while Im writing this my father is arguing with his boss because he does not get enough money. Im really scared of germans. Listening to music really helps me