I got a boyfriend? And I found out as I was crying?

Date: 27 june 2025 

Yk when ur doing fine but then someone asks "are u okay?" and all of a sudden u burst out crying? Well that sorta thing happened to me yesterday. 

I was hanging out with the guy I like, watching a movie, when I noticed my parents were fighting. My parents fighting I could ignore, but then I saw my brother stumbling in thru the door, obviously drunk asf, and then I could no longer pretend I was fine. I wanted to hide how upset I was so that this guy wouldn't actually get worried. Unfortunately for me he noticed how sad I was and hugged me, it made it impossible not to cry. Tears are fine-ish, but my chest jumping from my breathing as well, that feels terrible to do in front of someone. Makes me feel awkward and pathetic. That's the sorta crying I never want ppl seeing me doing. 

Then I started to feel worse cs I know he gets uncomfortable around ppl that are sad cs he doesn't know how to comfort them. And what came to my mind was that just that day I had found out that a couple that I'm friends with from school had broken up. So now I was super afraid that he was uncomfortable and wanted nothing to do with me (in retrospect I realize I might have been overreacting). Bcs of this I started apologising and asking if I was being too much and if he even wants to be with someone like me. And his response, not only made a lot of sense, but also got me some clarification on something I didn't think I was gonna get. He said "I'm not gonna break up with u cs u cried". Break up? Meaning we're in a relationship? I wasn't even sure we were tbh. I didn't comment on it but it made me feel a lot better.

From now on I think I'm gonna call him my boyfriend. It's a bit strange since I've never called someone that before, but it beats saying "the guy I like", sounds very one-sided lol. I'm hoping maybe he can call me his boyfriend at some point, but I don't wanna rush him. That's all I had to say, also my allergies are killing me. 

- Elliot