before you friend

i'm not writing a dni list because i think they're often more about performance than safety. people use them to signal morality or boundaries, but they usually end up vague, contradictory, or just alienating. you never really know who you're interacting with and a list with 30 bullet points won't change that. 

so here's a bit more about me and what you should know before interacting:

i'm into weird stuff. i say weird things. i may post about morbid topics sometimes. i have thoughts that make others uncomfortable, and i don't always explain myself. i experience taboo fixations and intrusive thoughts. some of them fall under clinical paraphilias. i'm non-offending and deeply self-aware. i know what's real and what isn't. if you associate all discomfort with danger, you probably won't like me. 

i don't believe in moral purity. i believe in accountability, harm reduction, and complexity. if you're looking for a hyper-sanitized internet experience, this isn't it. 

i don't tolerate bigotry. that should go without saying. i am queer, neurodivergent, and mixed. 

i won't coddle those who use dni lists to conflate "having a disorder" with "being abusive" or "having a fixation" with "committing harm." you're allowed to have boundaries, but don't weaponize them to dehumanize people like me.

please do not send me a friend request if you are under 17. i didn't care much before, but i would like to start actually making friends here rather than "friend collecting." i'm open to chatting but don't usually start conversations. i'm not socially inclined, but i'm not a dickhead. 

if you're confused, curious, or generally have questions about something i've said here, you're welcome to ask respectfully. i don't owe anyone explanations, but i do value honest conversation.

you don't need to agree with me. you don't need to like me. you have the option to block me. no need to announce it.