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I stir, the gentle light shining on my face. Light always bothered me, I can't remember when it didn't. I sit up, rubbing my eyes and lazed to the living room to let the dogs out.
They bark, they howl. I can't get it to stop, they wont stop. Its so loud. Just stop.
...
I sit on the cold plastic chair, the room aburst with laughter and whispers. I close my eyes and I put my hands on my ears. I cant get it to stop, they wont stop. Its so loud. Just stop.
...
I lay on my bed, staring at the blank white wall. The fan whirs and the room chills me to the bone. I hear the crashes, the yells. They slam onto my door, the footsteps louder, they wont stop. Its so loud. Just stop.
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I sat in the creased seat as the man spoke, disgust ringing in his eyes. His thin lips moving, telling me its all in my head. I grit my teeth, my brows furrowing, they wont stop. They wont stop. They wont stop.
...
I laid down in my queen sized bed, the lights dim. I look at my arms, the lighter lines scattering.
I ripped my headphones out of my bag and connected it to my phone. I started my playlist and all went away. The sun was sweet, the water glistening. The air cool, and my heart beat listening to the desire of all to be still, all to be quiet, all calm and all to be silent. The midnight sky sparkling with white diamonds.
The music playing in my ears drowning out my thoughts, feelings.
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Blank_driver
this hit so freaking hard, especially towards the end about using music to drown out ones own thoughts. little backstory but two years ago i was in a depressive state for like a long time, music was my way of escaping my own suicidal ideations.
this is beautiful...
thank you! I'm glad you could relate, but also on the contrary I'm sorry you could relate. I hope you're doing better.
by jenny; ; Report
its been two years lol, im ok thanks, just keep writing. its interesting to read
by Blank_driver; ; Report
thank you! have you read any of my other pieces?
by jenny; ; Report
im going thru different blogs, lemme go rn
by Blank_driver; ; Report
alright, thank you!
by jenny; ; Report