everything is worse

138 donnerstag

i figured, why not come back, why not keep ruining my life. 

i am doing extremely well. every single aspect of my life is great--great friends, great parents, a gorgeous academic life and a very exciting job offer, but still, i suck. 

my year has consisted of getting back together with every single ex-girlfriend i've ever had and every single time it never ends right, but we talk about it, which is great considering i hate to talk about my feelings. i've only one last ex to get in contact with (we are in contact, but not in contact, y´know), so i'll see how that goes. it all makes me feel miserable.

i am dropping out of the dating scene forever, it's not for me and i hate it, utterly despise it. maybe that's why i've not read more than five books while six months into 2025. i am a lazy piece of shit.