whatever. "summer 2025," bullets to my pins

wed. june 5 '25 

oh summer. your noises are in my ears once again. it feels a little bit better having them clear again. 

all quiet like empty mansions

i think i have been hung up for far too long now. i am trying to quit once again. because the other hundred times have gone so well. but you always find a way to get me thinking about you again. it's embarrassing (for me) and impressive (for you, and maybe for me, because this seems to happen over and over again) 

anxiety has been bleeding me dry and i wake up and waste these beautiful days baked and alone. the heartbeat of peace of mind gets slowly out of time. 

and the masochist in me, he tries to lose everything 

it's not enough to say that i miss you.