Slow

And again I can't morph into a person I want to be, leaving me with disappointment! I'm still not used to it, I can't catch up as much now, I never used to tho, I've always been like this! I just need to ignore it somehow, to focus on something else that has nothing to do with this! So that I can feel good for a bit, just to drop down and accept reality again, I'm not against the real, I just hate it, I can't deny that I do sometimes love it if I'm the third person and just watching myself suffer, it's fun, it's harmless to others, and really I just use my imagination and nothing more! Just say cope, I know, I have nothing to avoid, it's all fine, it's just that it can be better, I don't try at all, to fix it all, none!