Report Blog Entry
ive known this girl since 4th grade, i'll call her A. she was always a jerk to me, and i thought i was free of her when i got taken out of middle school, but when i finally went back to a new school for 9th grade, it turns out she started going there in 8th. things were... fine at first i guess, we didnt talk much but she would copy off my science work. but then i started dating my boyfriend and she started getting rude again. my boyfriend is very sweet, but i dont think he knows when its an appropriate time to show affection or not. this has caused people to start making fun of me and him, and while i do appreciate that he loves me, i wish that he would keep our physical affection (holding hands, headbutting me) private. i dont want to be known as the girl in the weird couple, but i dont want to hurt his feelings by expressing my discomfort. i just want this bullying to stop. i can hear A whisper about us in science class, i can hear her make fun of my boyfriend (for example, this morning he was selling donuts in the hallway, and when i told the teacher for attendance reasons i heard A say "well IM not buying donuts then....." or something bitchy like that.) i dont know what to do. do i try to protect my boyfriend's emotions by keeping quiet, or do i take action so that A will finally stop making fun of us? do i value my reputation and my dignity over my significant other's feelings? im so overwhelmed
how do i make this girl stop making fun of me? PLEASE HELP
0 Kudos
Comments
Displaying 1 of 1 comments ( View all | Add Comment )
Interestelar
i think you should value your boyfriend's feelings over >what people will think of you<. however, if you are uncomfortable with it independently of what others say, please talk to him about it and make sure he understands your point.
if im being honest, i am kind of uncomfortable with him being so affectionate in public, simply because im a bit socially anxious and not the kind of person who wants to draw attention to myself. im not sure if this makes me selfish or if this is a reasonable feeling. would you happen to have any advice on how to address this with him without making him feel guilty? if not thats ok, thank you for commenting in the first place
by xXp3yton_p3roxideXx; ; Report
nono that's not selfish, it's completely reasonable. first of all, remember to adapt my advice to how your boyfriend will better recieve the information - you're the one who knows him, not me.
now, if i was in your shoes, i would start with reassurance. i'd talk about how i adore my partner's demonstrations of love and that it's nice having them in my life.
i would then explain that, while it feels good to be loved by them, i (you) don't quite feel comfortable with being lovey-dovey in public due to personal, mind reasons.
so i'd keep two things clear the whole time while explaining myself: 1) that this discomfort is a *me* thing that comes from *my* mind and is not related directly to them, and 2) that this feeling is about the *circumstances* where the love demonstration happens, not the demonstration itself. the love is welcomed and cherished, always.
does this makes sense?
by Interestelar; ; Report
that makes sense, thank you so much dude i'll try to discuss with him sometime
by xXp3yton_p3roxideXx; ; Report
you're welcome bro!! hope this helps somehow :)
by Interestelar; ; Report