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I can’t love properly, and the people I want don’t like me back. I want to grow but I’m dependent on the feeling of love, I couldn’t go for a month without a crush or obsession unless I get depressed and do things that a robot would do. I feel like a fucking WHORE. WHY the hell do I love a girl with a bf and why do I love a boy with a gf. WHEN WILL I EVER PULL SOMEONE THAT ACTUALLY WANTS ME BACK. But at the same time someone liking me back (specifically boys) makes me uncomfortable, i’m so stupid because what the HELL do I actually want? A harem? A list of people to entertain my purpose of love? Do I just play around with people’s interests? Why can’t I ACTUALLY have a special, loving bond like other people? I hate love, I hate myself, but oh gosh, what will I EVER do without it?
STUPID
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Ethn
I like to think that finding true love isn't something you can just easily find, but instead you kind of have to let it come to you instead of searching for it. Kind of like fate or destiny, if it's meant to be then it's meant to be. But that doesn't mean you can't have fun and stuff, or go out and meet people. (I'm not sure if that makes sense but it sounded good in my head)