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DISCLAIMER: I do not know queer history. I never cared enough to read any books about it nor I had the opportunity to talk with elderly queer people. If you think that it makes my whole blog post invalid, I don't blame you. I just feel like I needed to disclose that.
If you're queer and often online you've probably came across this discussion. If you're even more online you most likely see posts like this once a month.
I used to have pretty strong opinion about this topic (strong enough to make a whole TikTok post about it, I mean), but because I saw it so many times, ironically I became indifferent towards it.
I am a lesbian and I identify as a gender under the non-binary umbrella, which in eyes of a lot of people makes me invalid. But I don't care. What I believe in is people identify with labels in good faith (a phrase I used to hate hearing).
I understand why people are defensive about labels. At the same time you won't change a mind of people who identify in a way that you seem invalid.
Can men be lesbian? No. Have I seen logical explanation why a trans man would want to identify as one? Yes. Would I date them or even interact on social media? Absolutely not. What I do if I see trans men lesbian on TikTok? Just scroll. Because apparently they have a reason to feel that way and screaming at them that they are wrong wont change anything.
My point is - in times when people are trying to get rid of us, fighting within our own community just makes us weaker. Live and let live other people. If someone identifies the way you dont want them to, don't waste your energy on them. It won't get us anywhere.
(no proof read, i had to get intoxinated in order to finish writing this blog post)
Comments
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supakillzonexD
this really confuses me. do trans men that identify themselves as lesbians really see themselves as men? because the definition of a lesbian is a woman loving another woman, i could see a nonbinary person calling themselves a lesbian because i guess in that sense it would now be up to how they present themselves and being out of the gender binary. regardless, i haven't heard much about this, so they can call themselves lesbians if they want. the concept is very initially confusing though!!
the definition of lesbian I saw few trans men use is "queer attraction towards women". other arguments I saw is if trans men transitiones later in life and identifyed as a lesbian before it's hard for them to change the label. or the fact that they grew up as females and still have some connection to womanhood, so their love for women is different from the one cis men have and i guess they lack a better label that would describe that
do what that info what you want, as I said before I do not really care about them ^^"
by Nix; ; Report
ohh i see!! I understand it a bit better now, thank you
by supakillzonexD; ; Report
Robyn
i came onto this post to tell you to stop being so pent up on labels because i thought this would be some more silly discourse, but this was a refreshing take. approved
yea, I wanted the title to be a clickbait, but couldn't think of anything interesting. Glad that it worked anyway ^^"
by Nix; ; Report
LOL good job!
by Robyn; ; Report
Nix
is it obvious i wrote 2 first paragraphts few months ago and diddnt read them before writing the rest, be hones
no
by Robyn; ; Report
yay
by Nix; ; Report