apr 25 2025 life update

i’ve accepted the fact that if i’m going to be friends with them then i’ll have to put in the most effort. that’s just how some friendships are. but i can’t lose them. i haven’t talked to them in two weeks and these two weeks have been hell. genuine depression central. so i’ll just coordinate all our hangouts and check in on them and send them reels that remind me of them. it’s okay. i’m okay.

it’s my best friend’s birthday tomorrow. yayyyyy avery!!!!! i can’t see her for like two more weeks though so that sucks. but its okay it’s just more time to plan her gift and all the things we’re gonna do

i’m back into creepypastas. i forgot how much i loved them. in sixth grade i would tell my friends a creepypasta story i found the night before and then after school i would find i new one to tell them the next day. they loved it, i loved it. ignoring the time we tried to summon slenderman behind our school. um anyway.

i wrote my first entire song. with guitar and lyrics and everything. i had only written verses before and forget even trying with the guitar. idk what to call it. lyrics are below.

thin shining lines on my upper thighs

or however it went in my head last night

i know they don’t care

still i bleed for attention

darling little bows tied around your wrists

you’re so skinny i can see your ribs

i know it’s unfair

beyond comprehension

is it a danger

if we’re sick together

i’ve seen things stranger

this could be worse

my teeth got sharper

but you love macabre

bite your flesh deeper

while i bite back my tongue

kicking up rocks toss them in the creek

think that was the last time we were happy

i can still taste the air

trapped in suspension

buy each other gum to stop the noise

we’ll cry in the morning kill the joy

truly i care

but this is addiction