it happens... a lot

In the second half of 2023 i started hook up with a girl, we are in the same class at college and we started flirting on a random day (i started it of course). Life happened for both of us and we continued flirting and giving each other secret kisses, at some point i thought that this time it would really be for life and she had been chosen to be my companion forever. anyway... the end of this was the same as all the other relationships in my life and i ended up falling in love with her more than she did with me, but for some reason this time i just can't forget her at all and it's slowly driving me crazy. 

All the other times i managed to get over it in a matter of months, five or six, but in a few months it will be 2 years that i only think about her, i can't have a deep relationship with anyone because i only think about her, i can't be interested in anyone because i only think about her. I'm TIRED, i can't stand being in these situations anymore, they take me out mentally, and the worst part of all is having to live with her every single day, five times a week, at college

Recently my life has become extremely hectic and i no longer have time to feel things, for a moment i thought that i had finally overcome it, but now i have relaxed and everything has come back to me like a big wave and i no longer know how to go on. i found out that she was in a relationship with someone else and that hurt me a lot inside, i didn't think that even after 2 years i would still be able to feel something about her as strongly as i do, i wonder when this will pass for good, i hope it will be soon soon. 

♫⋆｡♪ ₊˚♬ ﾟ. chemtrails - lizzy mcalpine