collegecareer

the school year is almost over and next year is coming too soon. i know i keep bringing this up but its only cause i cannot stop thinking about it. my friends are rooming together for college and im happy for them but also incredibly devastated. not that its their fault or that it has literally anything to do with me, i probably have a personality disorder. i should look into psychologists. anyways i was planning on going to a community college so that i dont have to deal with student loans, such is life, but honestly i really want to go to a technical school and learn radiology. like a radiologist technician. my grandpa used to work in a hospital and he said the radiologist techs were all pretty satisfied with their positions and got paid well. that was in like the 80s though so who knows. i honestly think i could do it, i would like looking at bones all day. i want to do something medical cause i actually love learning about physiology and stuff. i was also kinda considering phlebotomy tech and pharmacy but i havent looked into those as much. im scared of ever having to do cpr cause the idea of hearing ribs crack makes me sick. i know its necessary and im certified so technically i COULD do it but even on the practice dummy i hated it.

i used to want to be a tattoo artist. i still kind of want to, but i think the fear of messing up horrifically and somebody having that on their body forever is too haunting. i also have shaky hands on account of caffeine and anxiety soo not the best career choice for me. ive always loved art but i dont really think i want to make a career out of it. like even when i was younger i had no interest in doing animation or graphic design or concept art. its better as a hobby. 

i could probably do piercings. im not scared of needles and i could learn about anatomy and get my blood pathogen certification. not sure if most piercers are also tattoo artists though. its an option to consider, at least, if radiology doesnt work out. or i could just work at walmart.

okay. gonna go back to reading the yellow wallpaper. xoxo