waitingroom

the band class next to us in the morning was playing hella loud and we could hear it through the walls and it sounded EXACTLY like waiting room by fugazi. the beginning part of it. and so i had the beginning part of waiting room by fugazi stuck in my head all day. i love fugazi.

im so sick and exhausted and i need out of this school. but also my teacher said during class that well be out of here soon and then well go somewhere better and that made me incredibly sad, so. at least this means only 2 more ap tests for the rest of my life. yay

the tests this year are going to be on laptops and i wish they werent. i know its good to waste less paper and time setting up but i always feel like i write better on paper. i feel like theres a disconnect between my brains and the words im writing when its on a screen. typing. i sound so old. i really feel like technology wasnt meant to progress as far as it has. not the medical tech cuz that stuff is awesome but i seriously think nobody needs ai. like, nobody. why would i want to use ai to do something that i WANT to do? like why does everyone feel so entitled to art? you dont HAVE to make art. i make art because i work hard to improve and its something i genuinely love. you “make art” by typing it into a screen and letting a computer do all the work. you steal others work so you can pretend you accomplished something (and fuck up the environment while youre at it) having a picture in front of you doesnt make you an artist.

and you dont have to practice art your whole life for it to matter. you can start at 18 or 30 or 40 or 70 it doesnt matter. it doesnt have to be good you dont have to master anatomy or lighting or composition. you dont even have to enjoy it bc every artist i know hates the process at least a little bit (including me). what matters is if you thought about it and tried it. ai “art” has no thought or effort behind it.

not literally YOU you. the metaphorical you. the symbolic you. unless you are an ai “artist”. then i mean you. 

not sure how this became a rant about ai. xoxo