24-3-25, Monday

We all take separate paths in life, none of them being right,

none of us being sure.

Some live a life of self-sacrifice and obedience, some focus on academic interests and careers, some most seek a partner, some want wealth or fame as always. I most seek simplicity.

I feel odd in my path, separated from the rest. Being in an advanced school with highly academic people does that to you.

I eat plants off the ground and learn to tie knots, dream of discomfort and adventure, it just feels naïve and romanticized. Everyone in my life tells me I will not survive without a proper job. Everyone already paved out a path for me, a path that, im afraid, would lead to my spiritual death and compliance. They tell me there is no other, like an evil dictator from a movie.

It would be most naïve to believe them, I think. Never has there been a time that a government was all righteous, a society wasn't flawed. It's all a vague, general buzz of nonsense.

I watch a guy living his van life, living off the bare minimum. No job, no diploma, he's happy. I look at my father, tied to the screen in a data job from nine to five. he's happy. They value different things, that's all.

I value what the truck guy values. The people around me are the ones that drag me into uncertainty, into wasting my time, into complying to the system that never served me. They tell me their worries and the dangers, as if their own path holds none. Everybody thinks they are correct, and I think I'm correct too.

But the river flows and the sunlight glistens in it, no matter where I step. And if I fail, it'll take my flesh someplace else, and all will stay well.

Midnight.