Walk in the rain

So today was absolutely POURING!!! Right when I was walking home too! 

Though it didn't bother me that much. The rain kinda grounded me. I really needed to feel something. Sometimes I spend days at a time disconnecting from reality as much as possible, what on accident, what on purpose. I suppose it's really a way I deal with things. Life's never been too kind to me (though my problems are very first world), so I've always just tried to escape everything to the best of my abilities. For me daydreaming was the best of my abilities. All of these silly imaginary people have always been there when I needed them when real people haven't. 

Sorry for the random tangent, I guess I'm just emo so I gotta write sad shit on my blog, not like anyone reads it anyways. And even if they do, not like they care. 

Anyway I took a cute piccy in the rain so here's that (idk if it will load, still don't know how anything works)

Skool rlly sux, I'm gonna skip if shit keeps being this awful. Can't wait for spring break so I don't have to think about anything that's going on. Cuz I've given up. I js wanna move on with my life and not be miserable forever. 

It's like my lack of social skills keeps coming back to bite me in the ass. Everyone else has learned how to just be normal around people and make friends except for me. I just don't know what to do or how to do it, ever. And life keeps putting me into situations and then I fuck up cuz I'm stupid. Literally I'd much rather be getting C's at skool and have normal friendships like everyone else than be a straight A student but alone :(

Well, okay, maybe I have a few friends but Idk if I know the people well enough to call them my friends. How do you even classify a friendship. Do you ask? Just assume after a certain amount of time? I usually just wait until the other person says it O_O

It might partially be my chronic RBF. People have told me multiple times they thought I wanted to kill them when I was just resting my face. Like I feel so bad 😭 I don't hate everyone! 

Anyway, long enough ramble, gonna go eat smn :p