filter

viewing the world through a shitty $50 camera and hearing it through old broken headphones and a walkman

its beautiful but its filtered

she views me through pictures and hears me through 15 second songs.

im sure she doesnt listen fully haha.

its okay because i dont listen either.

filmed a concert on my camera and i swear i can hear the speakers breaking all over again every time i play it back. but i play it back anyway, even if i can't make out the words or songs. that means something in my head that i cant put properly into words.

are feelings more important that reality? im afraid she wont love me anymore once she really sees me. i am curated to her every time we talk, like a mixtape she can play whenever she wants.

i would like to believe that isn't true, and it probably isn't. but i can't shake the feeling.

sometimes i wonder if she would be happier with a boy. but thats just because im insecure.

idontknoweither